In January 2020, (pre-covid) James and I were invited to a birthday bash at a secret club in the warehouse district of our city.
I can't show you pictures, but it's the kind of place that's so cool it feels almost illegal.
The dress code was evening cocktail.
James chose Italian wool and vintage leather. I wore a silk jumpsuit and high-heeled booties.
And we showed up to PARTY
It was everything a magical night is supposed to be—with cocktails, live music, and lots of laughter.
We flirted and danced with everyone and reconnected with dear friends we hadn't seen in forever.
One of those friends, (a friend of a friend) sat down beside me and chatted in a heart-to-heart kind of way people in mid-life do as they realize that soon the big party of life will be over.
Then he glanced down and saw my high-heels.
"Wow!" he said, with a look of surprise on his face. "Those are really slutty boots!"
He didn't mean this as a criticism. It was something that just popped out from an authentic place of surprise.
I started to laugh.
"That's just the meaning you're giving them," I said, nudging him with my elbow.
Because let's be honest. We give everything the meaning it holds for us.
We categorize things into good or bad. Right or wrong. Holy or unholy.
If you were new to planet earth and saw my boots, you wouldn't associate them with anything sexual. You may find them weird or strange or intriguing. But slutty?
No. That's social conditioning, love.
I understand this at a deep level.
I grew up at a Bible Institute where clothing, hemlines, haircuts, (and yes, even footwear) were carefully monitored.
Good girls wore conservative shoes like Mary Janes or Penny Loafers,
Bad girls (strippers, hookers, and women with questionable morals) wore stilettos.
And this makes things easy, doesn't it? Having only two options tricks us into feeling safe. There's less chance of a mistake that way.
Once we choose a position, we can be certain of being RIGHT.
But do you see the problem?
There's an entire field of possibilities between the polar opposites of GOOD and BAD that your brain misses out on.
Thankfully, your body's in touch with the bigger picture and will sound the alarm when your thought process is out of whack.
You know that pinched up feeling of judgement?
That's the alarm bell trying to get your attention.
"Get back to your centre," it says. "There are other options you're not considering."
But if you don't understand the language of your body, you're going to miss vital information.
And that's where I can help.
So don't worry if you don't understand the secret code of your emotions.
Because (wink, nudge) I'm really good at cracking it.
Sending you so much love,
P. S. I want you to use your brain, instead of the other way around. If you're not sure of the thinking style that's in operation right now, let's chat. CLICK HERE for a free consultation.