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Kelli Younglove

Why Blinders (and Earplugs) are a Girl's Best Friend


Hello beautiful! You know those leather cups they put on either side of a horse’s eyes to keep it focused on what’s in front of it?

Good. I want you to run out RIGHT NOW and buy a pair.

Because you’re going to need them, my friend! If you’ve got a desire to change something in your life—whether it’s your weight, your love life, or your bank account—then you’re going to need to blinder up! Which means you’ve got to put all your attention on the goal (aka: the reality you want) and refuse to see anything but THAT. Even if it’s just in your imagination for now. And that’s not easy, I admit it. Because any time you challenge the status quo, there will be CROWDS of people waving frantically, shouting, reminding you of the facts.

  • It’s harder to lose weight at “your age”

  • All the good ones are taken.

  • The economy sucks. Competition is fierce.

They think they’re helping by pointing out the truth, but what they’re really doing is pointing out the results of a collective mindset. Because when a lot of people look at a something long enough (and talk about it and agree on it,) there tends to be more evidence to support it. But that’s not the "truth” you want to be looking at! Where you are right now is NOT YOUR WHOLE TRUTH! It’s just a point on the map. Your truth is inside you, Ducky! You’re not separate from the source of wellbeing that’s always available to you. (And if you’re one of my atheist friends, that’s okay. You’re not separate from your endless capability for creative solutions and new ideas. It’s all the same thing. And it’s all good.) But let’s be honest. Most times our “current reality” is just the result of what we’ve been thinking and feeling and acting upon. It’s about what we’ve been telling ourselves on a daily basis. It’s about the constant drum-beating of negative thoughts and self-diminishing behavior.

It’s about our own disconnection.

(Which, interestingly enough, is usually caused by listening to what they’re shouting down there on the street.) Which is why you’ll need earplugs too. So you can block out all the bad advice and scary statistics. Because you can’t receive WANTED if you’re focused on UNWANTED! That may seem a bit daunting, but it's really good news. If you can think and behave your way into a set of circumstances, then you can think and behave your way out. As Ortega y Gasset said: “Tell me what you pay attention to and I’ll tell you who you are.” So instead of staring at the number on the scale, or the number at the bottom of your bank statement (or the number of times he’s called) put on your blinders. Keep your eyes on the prize. And it won’t be long before those people on the street are pointing at you. And wondering how you got so damn lucky. Sending you so much love,

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